Elster's World

Thursday, August 31, 2006

Rock N Roll (Football) Fantasy

Sorry for the silence here at Elster’s World. I have been on a mini (and quite sucky) vacation this week and didn’t feel like posting anything.

Last night, the Zionist Conspiracy fantasy football league (led by the great Joe) held its draft. It was a night of pageantry and celebration. OK, it was a night where six people who had no idea what they were doing attempted to pick fantasy football squads relying on little more than mock draft sheets from ESPN and Sports Illustrated. With six people picking twenty picks (one minute per pick) I was all set for a long evening in front of the computer. I fasted the majority of the day so there was no worries about having to use the facilities during crunch time. Of course, I ended up with the fourth pick in a three pick draft. Here’s what transpired:

6:00 pm – I log in to find Joe and TO already on. Akiva, Jetsphan and MOC are no where to be seen. Bad start. After shooting the breeze, MOC comes on. Though we are supposed to begin at 6:15, Joe gives Phan a five minute grace period.

6:20 – MOC grabs LT with the first pick. I would have gone with Larry Johnson, but since San Diego will have the human turnover Phil Rivers starting at QB, they will be relying on Tomlinson even more heavily.

The computer picks Shaun Alexander for Akiva (who never shows up for the draft) and the computer then drafts Larry Johnson for Phan (who still isn’t here). I bite the bullet and grab Tiki Barber, hoping this isn’t the year the wheels come flying off. Joe cuts against the grain and takes Fantasy stud Peyton Manning and TO completed the first round by grabbing Rudi Johnson and Carnell “Cadillac” Williams back to back.

Other highlights from the draft included:

- Team Joe took Brian Westbrook and Willis Mcgahee to stand behind Manning, causing him to proclaim "I don’t love my running backs”. Um, but we love your running backs Joe. He took Arizona’s pair of wide outs and is hoping that Kurt Warner stays alive long enough to keep tossing it to them. The computer accidentally picks Vilma for Joe 2 rounds too early causing team Elster to take his linebackers earlier than expected (more on that later). Joe ends up with two Jets, Laverneous Coles (very solid number three receiver) and Vilma (my top rated defensive player – tackling machine who should make more big plays in the 3-4).

- With two stud running backs in tow, TO grabbed Carson Palmer and Terrel Owens (“I just had to”) with his next two picks. In fact, TO had a very solid, if very boring draft. The lone controversy was his selection of Ed Reed, causing me to ask if Reed was eligible to play since I thought he was in prison.

- The computer picked well for latecomer Jetsphan, who ended up with two great backs (LJ and Edge James), a shaky QB (McNabb) and 2 interesting receivers (Randy Moss and Chris Chambers). He showed his evil side by grabbing John Abraham causing me to call him a traitor. He also grabbed a number of the players I wanted (Stephen Jackson, Chris Gamble, Derrick Brooks and Hines Ward).

- The computer picked really well for Akiva, considering he didn’t even show up. It grabbed Clinton Portis for him (letting me make my “does that pick come with a free sling?” joke) and Drew Brees (causing me to proclaim he has the all-shoulder team). But all joking aside, he is deep.

- MOC’s team is boring. Solid but boring.

- Finally we have Team Elster. I am ok with my running backs (Barber and Dunn), LOVE my receivers (Steve Smith/Chad Johnson) and am ok with my QBs (the crappy Manning and Delhomme). I took a flyer on Braylon Edwards and his reconstructed knee with my third pick and grabbed Jeremy Shockey as my tight end (causing Joe to change my name to Giantsphan). I hate my bench – Julius Jones (losing time to Barber) Edwards (either brilliant or awful) and Chris Cooley (waited too long for Alge Crumpler). For some reason, I took two kickers. And yet, I wasn’t even drunk. When Joe took Vilma, I immediately used early round picks on Donnie Edwards and Keith Bullock - I would rather have gotten ALge Crumpler.

Well, the draft was really fun and I hope everyone has a successful season (most of all, me). The whole thing took under an hour and I was able to enjoy a tasty grilled chicken in lafa at a reasonable time (kudos to Mrs. Ester for running out and grabbing that for me – Thanks dear). I will keep you posted as the season progresses. I’m sure you are all riveted.


  • You thought Ed Reed was in prison? What is this, prejudice against Ravens? I wouldn't blame you, the truth is, given the Ravens' track record with getting in trouble with the law.

    By Blogger Jewboy, at 11:39 AM  

  • And of course, I took Sean Taylor so I am really not one to talk.

    By Blogger Elster, at 12:03 PM  

  • I think you have the best team as long as Steve Smith - who as you know I passed on at #8 - is healthy. I will need Manning to have a dominant year to have a chance. With Edgerrin James gone, he just might.

    TO made an interesting move, picking Carson Palmer in the 2nd round, and then Matt Hasselbeck in the 6th.

    It's funny about the linebackers. Vilma was the first defensive player taken, and suddenly you took two with your next two picks.

    Coles was ranked very low on the lists I saw. He should have a better year. Except at the top, however, wide receivers are a dime a dozen.

    Jetsphan's pick of Abraham was the shock of the draft. Nobody - not even me - hated Abraham more than phan.

    By Blogger Joe Schick, at 4:05 PM  

  • As for my RBs, in my defense, I did not expect phan and Akiva to not show up, causing the computer to allot them three each before I even drafted my first in the third round. I wound up with the 12th, 15th and 17th RB taken.

    By Blogger Joe Schick, at 4:08 PM  

  • I still cannot get over the Abraham selection. It was indeed the shock of the draft.

    I also just found out Dunn has a balky groin so my #2 rb has a vad groin and my 1 wr has a bad hammy

    By Blogger Elster, at 9:52 PM  

  • Boring can be good. And, what about my pick of Reggie Bush? That might have been stupid but it wasn't boring.

    By Blogger MoChassid, at 10:11 AM  

  • Bush was one of those either pure genious or stupidity moves. Time will tell.

    By Blogger Elster, at 10:53 AM  

  • On second thought, Bush was a good move. There are plenty of third tier RBs out there in case of injury, but Bush is one guy with potential significant numbers by mid-season.

    By Blogger Joe Schick, at 11:53 AM  

  • The only issue with Bush is that he has an other good runner on the team. In fact, in effect he made Duece Mcallister a waiver wire guy.

    By Blogger Elster, at 12:07 PM  

  • Agreed, but Bush got such a huge bonus, that at some point they may give him the ball 20 times a game.

    By Blogger Joe Schick, at 12:10 PM  

  • If he can handle the ball 20x a game. I think he will be a special player in the league. Look at Barbera and Dunn - both are small rb's who made the pro bowl last year.

    By Blogger Elster, at 12:13 PM  

  • BTW, the computer did not pick for Akiva. He told me in an e-mail that he pre-ranked 100 players in advance.

    By Blogger Joe Schick, at 1:47 PM  

  • ah
    which explains why defensive players were picked.

    By Blogger Elster, at 3:13 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home