Elster's World

Tuesday, May 24, 2005

I'm So Tired

I feel like I have been swimming upstream for the last six years. Don't get me wrong, life is pretty good. Overall, I really don't have that much to complain about. Well, there is this one teeny tiny thing....WORK.

I hate my job. Despise, abhor, fill in your own word here. Yes, yes, I know. Everyone hates their job. Join the club you big crybaby. Well, for me ladies and gentlemen, it's different. My hatred has taken on a physical and emotional life of its own. It ruins my sleep, ruins my weekends. Makes we irritable when I should be happy. It's not fair to me or my family.

So quit, you say. And excellent advice that is. The only problem is, well, money. I need it. There's that pesky mortgage thing, tuition. Oh yeah, and food and clothes and stuff.

But I am working on it. I am ready to move on. I cannot hide in my office and pretend forever. I used to think that SOMETHING GREAT!!! was going to come along. But I realized that SOMETHING GREAT !!! Doesn't come along for people like me. People like me have to make their own luck. Take a risk, make a change. I will have to take matters into my own hands.

But hell, it's scary business jumping ship mid-stream. I know what I want to do (write) but what if I can't make a living out of it? What if I'm fooling myself? Authors are a dime a dozen. Successful authors? Well, they are a bit more rare.

Of course I'd love to hear what you guys think. Oh wait, there are no "you guys". Even better. My blog is like a secret journal with no lock. It's private, but anyone can read it. How very exciting.

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